I lived in EKOSODIN which was the DEN of UNSERIOUS STUDENTS. They took me in LIKE THE YOUNG JIM HAWKINS when MY DAD bought free BOOZE for some GUYS in HALL 1. HE followed me to SCHOOL to HANDLE MY REGISTRATION. I was YOUNG and PROTECTED. They begged him to go home. They promised to take care of me. When DR SCOTT EMUAKPOR told my Dad to leave me that I was not a Baby that I would sort myself out, he handed me over to the BROOD OF VIPERS without knowing it and left for the EAST. THAT WAS MY SECOND NUTURE COMPLEX.
My parents and my older brother were SHOCKED when I decided to study AGRIC ECONOMICS and TICKED UNIVERSITY OF BENIN as my first choice in JAMB. I grew up in a RESEARCH INSTITUTE and the courses of choice amongst the kids in my INSTITUTE then were MEDICINE, ENGINEERING, PHARMACY, LAW , GEOLOGY and the high sounding courses. The schools of choices were UNIVERSITY OF PORTHARCOURT, UNIVERSITY OF NIGERIA, IMOSU, they now call it IMSU not to lend CREDENCE to the OSU CASTE system in IGBO LAND which inadvertently appears in the name IMOSU. FUNNY!!
News filtering fromBENIN, BENDEL STATEthen was not healthy. FREQUENT STUDENT DEMONSTRATIONS and ANINI THE GREAT. They did not realize in my home that my attraction were the demonstrations and to see ANINI THE ROBBER. It was when I threatened to relocate toAba in Abia State, Nigeriaand learn theMEDICINE STORE BUSINESSthat they summarily let theMAD MAN and HIS THOUGHTS to be.
My first introduction into BENIN was a BTV news of A WOMAN CLIMBING DOWN from the PYLONS OF HIGH TENSION POLES one bright morning. When she came down and was interviewed, she intoned that SHE WAS GOING FOR A MEETING AND HER AEROPLANE CRASHED ON THE HIGH TENSION WIRES. My heart leapt with joy at that news, for I REALIZED THAT I HAD CHOSEN THE RIGHT CITY AND SCHOOL. It was going to be an EVENTFUL 5 years. I ended up spending 13 years in BENIN, was in DIASPORA, lost CONTACT with my family and became A LOCAL TV STAR. That’s the story for another day. OBA ATOPE, ISE!! I had A TITLE, “theODIONWERE OF ONI STREET, GRA BENIN”.
Chief Oni was the HEAD OF THE OLOKUN CULT and HIS HOUSE was opposite my house at 13 ONI Street, GRA, BENIN. I lived in GRA BENIN when I left school with my GREAT PALS, PATRICK OKPEKU(MAY HIS SOUL REST THE PEACE), OSAINOMA OKPEKU AND OSY OHIEN. We ran a TV PROGRAMME,CUTZ, STYLZAND GISTZwithAKUNNA NWAGHA (neeOJIJI) , LILY IGBINOSUN, OMONI OBOLI (nee UKEY) and BARBARA OKOJIEofDANGEROUS FAME.HIGHLY INTELLIGENT WOMEN who DID NOT NEED SCRIPTS to DISCUSS ANY TOPICS. We had a SESSION with KEPPY EKPENYONG and OBY EDOZIEN. We took them on the program once to talk about their MOVIE, ‘TO HAVE AND TO CHERISH’. My friend DAVID IVAN DANISA introduced them to us and MATHIAS OBIAGHABGON was in TOW as the PRODUCER. They were disappointing and HAD to constantly look at their scripts. KEPPY was ADEPT at DOING JUSTICE to CHELSEA DRY GIN then. I do not know if he has stopped.
We were KINGS AND QUEENS OF THE TUBE. WE RULED BEFORE the COMING OF KENNY AND D1. WE had ADVERTS from COWBELL, TOP TEA, PEAK, AFPRINT. We LIVED in a 3 BEDROOM BUNGALOW we got for N70K then, and LEASED OUT THE BQ to a STAFF from CBN, BENIN for 100k who was HAPPY to get PECKS from OUR TABLES of BEAUTIFUL WOMEN who THRONGED our HOME seeking to APPEAR ON THE TV PROGRAMME. We would collect his N100k and pay the Landlord N70K pocketing N30k. He was paying our house rent and was living in the Boys Quarters.
Chief ONIEPITOMIZED weirdness and had about 10 WIFES, mostly acquired after visitations for solutions to problems. He had countless kids. One of the kids suddenly saw an ADONIS in me. A wiry, dog-like looking creature. Ha!!! Daughter of the priest of OLOKUN. I was not ready to meet God. She even threatened to report me to her Dad. I called her BLUFF when Chief ONI was hospitalized for 4 weeks after consuming A LIFE CHICKEN during his annual JANUARY, IGBE (OLOKUN) FESTIVAL. The GODS must have gone to the MARKET that YEAR.
I honed my skills in EKOSODIN, but refused to sing with THE GUYS IN THE BUSHES AT NIGHT. They left me to my whims. The first hostel I stayed in, FLORI HOSTEL had a GARDEN OF WEEDS in front of it, planted by my friends. YOUNG MEN sent to SCHOOL by hardworking parents would SMOKE TO OBLIVION, sang SHABBA RANKING SONGS and argued that the INSCRIPTION ON A POSTER ON THE WALL IN OUR ROOM did not read “I AM THE BREAD OF LIFE”, BUT “JAM THE BREAD OF LIFE”. The “I” in the “AM” was actually curved like a “J” and looked like ‘JAM’ and had a PICTURE OF A BOTTLE OF JAM next to the BREAD. A FIGHT ENSUED OVER THE ACTUAL WORD. A lip was torn. I had to come in to SETTLE the IMPASSE since I was the ONLY SANE and SOBER ONE AMONGST THE LOT. I told them that the INSCRIPTION WAS ‘I AM THE BREAD OF LIFE, BUT SINCE THE BOTTLE OF JAM WAS NEXT TO THE BREAD, CHRIST HAD DECIDED TO J’AM THE BREAD OF LIFE.’ THEY BELIEVED AND AGREED and the SMOKING CONTINUED. Maybe you have seen that POSTER too. The LIFE OF CANNABIS AND CHEAP GIN!!!!!

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